"Ayyy Mamacita!"

One of the biggest points that my school’s study abroad office addressed before we came to Ecuador was the “machismo” attitude of Ecuadorian men.  Machismo is a phenomenon not only limited to Ecuador, but is prominent in almost every Latin-American culture.  I think the best way to describe machismo is by telling you about my morning walk to school every day. 

On my way to school, I walk by two buildings that are currently under construction.  Now I understand that construction workers back home aren’t given the most conservative stereotype, but every day like clockwork as I walk to school I am whistled at, kissed at, and told I’m beautiful by these men.  I realize when I explain it, it really doesn’t sound so terrible; who wouldn’t like being called beautiful on a daily basis?  EXCEPT: there is nothing I can do about it.  Responding to the attention only makes the situation worse.  Women are expected to assume a submissive role and just absorb the comments powerlessly. 

Women here are first and foremost, objects to be scrutinized.  On one walk through the city, I was with 2 other American girls, and a man approached us, pointed straight at one of us and stated that she was the prettiest one, and went on his merry way.  If I wanted to be rated on my looks, I’d enter in a beauty pageant thank you very much!  I recognize that women are objectified even in my beloved United States, but never before have I been expected to be submissive to men to that extreme.    

Sometimes it’s not even in an obvious manner.  In my homestay, our nightly ritual is bread and tea as a family.  I was already seated at the table with my “dad,” but “mom” was in the bathroom.  He got up and brought out the tea kettle to pour me a cup of tea when she came out of the bathroom.  She looked at him funny, and she insisted on pouring the tea, to which he replied, “I’ll be the waitress tonight.”  I realize it was to be taken as a joke, but the fact that it’s so tacitly understood by the two of them is what I found so striking.  Don’t get me wrong, they are happily married and very respectful to one another, but in their daily routine, Rita does “wait” on Jaime. At home, my dad sets the table, does the laundry and the dishes just as much as my mom does.  And I can guarantee if my dad “waited” on my family, there would not be any objections coming from my mother! 

But in all seriousness, I really did take for granted the gender equality that exists in the United States.  What I learned most from this experience is that there is a fine line between valuing the family unit and gender inequality.  Jaime really does respect Rita, and the way they run their household works for them.  However, I think the expectations in a typical Ecuadorian household allow men to have a superior attitude toward the women population as a whole.